27 August 2005

Gullible's Travels II: Ghetto Zoo, Electric Boogaloo

So now it's Tuesday.
Not in real life, but in Storyland.
Steven and I agreed to watch my 5-year-old nephew, Connor, while the parentals were off working for the day.
Because we all know how much I love children.
*ahem*
I hate kids.
But my nephew is cool, most of the time.
He's pretty well behaved, most of the time.
Tim and Brenda are great parents, actually.
Brenda teaches 'tards in elementary school, which means she has the patience of a saint and really great disciplinary skills, and Tim is a social worker with a degree in Psychology and a Master's in Social Work, so if anyone can raise a kid right, these two can.
So we took Connor to the Mill Mountain Zoo.
Mill Mountain is the main attraction in the city of Roanoke.
It's literally right in the middle of the city and rises over 1,000 feet above the heart of downtown.
The main feature of the mountain is that it is topped with a giant man-made star.
The Star, built in 1949, is considered by the city to be the "World's Largest Man-Made Illuminated Star."
The Mill Mountain star stands 88½ feet tall. It uses 2000 feet of neon tubes and 17,500 watts of power, so it puts out a pleasant little hum.
Here are pictures of the star that we took during the day and at night, along with a sweeping panoramic vista of downtown Roanoke and the adjacent countryside and mountains:








Star During the Day








Star at Night

(How come you can say "at night" but you can't say "at day" without sounding retarded?)







Perched on the side of Mill Mountain about 100 yards below the Star is the Mill Mountain Zoo.

This vast mountainside habitat for tens of random animals covers a whopping 3½ acres.
There are literally a total of about 30 animals in this zoo.
And I think I'm being generous.
I'm fairly certain that if my parents were to gather a couple of squirrels, skunks, deer, neighborhood dogs and cats, and other such creatures that could be found in the area, put them in their backyard, and call it the Hayes Zoo; it would pretty much rival the Mill Mountain Zoo.
I'm not complaining; I'm just making an observation.
I thoroughly enjoyed my ghetto-zoo experience, as did Steven and Connor.
The Mill Mountain Zoo actually had a few creatures that I have never seen before, so that alone made it worth every penny of their over-inflated admission charge of $7.25 for adults and $4.50 for children.
Here are some of the nifty animals that we discovered in the Mill Mountain Zoo:


This is a Red Panda.
Red Pandas, also known as Lesser Pandas are not as well known as the larger, black and white, Giant Panda although they share similar habitat and habits. At only 10-15 pounds Red Pandas are agile climbers and spend much of the time in treetops.








You can see here that even though they are first cousins to the Giant Panda, the Red Panda looks more like a cross between a fox and a raccoon.












Speaking of foxes, this is a Kazakhstan Corsac Fox.
Little is known about the wild habits of the Corsac Fox. Corsac Foxes appear to be more social than many fox species but much can be learned about these fascinating animals in zoos. There are very few Corsac Foxes in the care of humans and currently the pair here at Mill Mountain Zoo are the only Corsac Foxes on exhibit on the East Coast of the United States.


Here I am with Connor and a Dwarf Zebu.
Dwarf Zebu are a domesticated cattle species. There are millions of cattle in the world with domesticated cattle being the most abundant large mammal in the world with the exception of man. Zebu cattle are considered sacred in India. Hindu religion teaches that the soul of a human being returns in each cow.
The word "zebu" is derived from the Tibetan word "ceba" which means, "hump". The hump is made of fat and an enlarged muscle. Though it is not the same as a camel's hump, a cow can live off the fat stored in its hump for short periods of time when food is unavailable. The hump is not necessary for zebu survival; however, the hump is thought to be important in attracting a mate.
Dwarf Zebu usually weigh between two and three hundred pounds and can live more than twenty years.

Here I am posing with the Zebu.
I was trying to maneuver him into position, but he wasn't having it. He totally posed for the camera all by himself, and because I speak zebuese here's how our conversation went:
ME: Come here, puppy.
ZEBU: Quit grabbing my hump.
ME: I want to take a picture with you. You're pretty.
ZEBU: I know. And quit grabbing my hump.
ME: But I just want you to look at that camera right over there.
(I try to lift his head towards the camera.)
ZEBU: Okay. Let me do it myself.
So then he totally set his head on the fence, he let me pose with him, and he waited for Steven to take the picture before he went back to standing in his own urine and pushing around the Vietnamese Pot-bellied Pigs.

Before leaving the zoo, we all decided to take the little train ride that they offer around the park. It costs $2 a piece to ride the midget train and it takes about 2½ minutes to make 2 loops around the ghetto zoo, but if you don't ride the train, you don't get to see the Red Wolf or the Sichuan Takin. Both of which are animals that I had not seen before, so I was determined to ride the stupid train.

On our way back to the house, we decided to stop for a quick round of mini golf at Star City Mini Golf, which is just off the highway a couple of miles from the house.
And we were not at all disappointed in keeping with the day's theme of "ghetto activities."
This little rinky-dink attraction seems to have just been haphazardly thrown together on the side of a hill, with virtually no effort whatsoever.
Here's a picture of the 3 of us after completing our round, and notice the miniature replica of the Mill Mountain Star behind us:



Roanoke is very proud of their star.
We all seem to have that look on our faces that says, "Did we just do this?"
Surprisingly enough, the course was actually fairly difficult and much more interesting than it appeared from the side of the road.
Onward we travel to the house for a vegetable soup and grilled cheese dinner.

To be continued...
Next episode: Going Out on a Tuesday Night, or Roanoke: The City That Died.

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